Too much stuff; Doggie Daycare; Grief & Marriages

BOOK: see www.KathyBriantBooks.com for some more writing samples

Figuring out the final conflict when all this stuff comes to me about another character. Could it be another book?

LIFE:

My little dog needs a daycare for her once  a week socialization with other pooches and to meet new people. I need somewhere closer than the one I use now, though the trainer is great. This one has rest time where staff sit on the floor with dogs who are resting on blankets – soft music, aromatherapy. Do they have a place like this for people? Sign me up.

Rosie & Gus, playing as pups. A dog’s gotta play.

GRIEF: 106 Ways to Deal with Grief, www.KathyBriantBooks.com

The idea behind the statement…

29. Your spouse may be grieving in their own say, quite differently from you. Allow them the benefit of the doubt.

Many marriages break up, especially after the death of a child. Two people behaving in irrational ways because of grief can tear each other apart. You need to let each other be and be gentle. Do not have expectations of them that may be unrealistic for them.

Men tend to spend more time numb. To wives it can appear uncaring. The wife is a puddle of emotion, crying, etc. and the husband is standing there stoic. The tears may even frighten him and he walks away. The numbness looks like no reaction at all, as though he doesn’t care. Or the roles may switch. One woman told me it took her five years to react to the loss of her son and then it hit as though the loss happened yesterday. The husband had almost completed his process while the wife was at the very beginning. Imagine living in the same house without a lot of understanding of what the other is going through. Comfort, talk and then leave the person alone without you criticizing or condemning or disapproving. It’s not your process maybe, but it is theirs.

People can be so different in their approach to grief. They are often surprised themselves at their behaviors, but that’s grief. So different. Grieve in your own way and please allow the person to grieve in theirs – there is no right and wrong and no one way to do it.